You can sew all you want,
but criminals don't care about
bras. So let's not force
everyone to wear them.

Regulation only burns
the good pies. Outlaw butter
here, and bakers will import
the cheap stuff from Canada.

I say: train every preacher
to choir a nun. That way,
during an emergency
baptism, the congregation
will be cloaked in song.

If I die in a mass bra-burning,
tattoo a nipple
on both biceps,
and bury me in my
God-given underwear.